• Marie Trout

Kicking Ass

Three days ago, my world sank. It felt as if I ran right into a wall of darkness.


Walter had no appetite at breakfast, but went about his business. A few hours later, he came home from a run to Trader Joe’s looking really weak. He felt hot to the touch. Since he is on immuno-suppressant drugs, this has historically meant that we need to act fast, because his immune system cannot fight as well as it used to.

I wanted to bring him to UCLA immediately. But he refused.

His fever was 102 – way above 101, which is the point where we need to take action.

He insisted to go lie down. My heart sank, and I agreed to give him an hour – and then we’d reassess. I gave him zinc and vitamin C – since I had had a cold, and our youngest had too.

And then I waited. The old feelings of “what if” came right back and almost bowled me over. It is still all so recent. I calmed myself – couldn’t focus on my work – so sat down with a cup of tea and watched HGTV! The wall of fear was massive.

But a show about the redemptive power of taking old dumpy houses and turning them into castles somehow helped.

An hour later I walked back in and we checked Walter’s temperature. I fully expected disaster. I had the phone ready to dial 911. And you know what? His temperature had dropped to 101!

I filled him with more water and manuka honey, and let him rest for another hour. When I came back in, his temperature was in the normal range in one ear, and 100.8 in the other ear!

An hour later all was NORMAL!!!!

You know what that means? His immune system is actually WORKING again, AND his new liver is too! I did a dance around his room – both index fingers taking turn pointing to the sky as I boogied all over the bedroom while singing a little jig with totally heartfelt lyrics:

“Walter, you are kicking aaaass – kicking aaaaass!!!

He laughed so hard and kept chuckling at the ridiculousness of it… I don’t know – for me it was totally felt! Just one of those moments…..

Here we are now a few days later – and he is still kicking aaaaas!

Today the band rehearses here, I am back writing and editing, and HGTV is turned off!

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